Rethinking Success: Finding A Work/Life Balance

Posted Oct 15, 2007 by Dave Simanoff

Updated Oct 15, 2007 at 12:41 PM

Natalie Thomas isn’t making any compromises.

The 35-year-old associate at Holland & Knight in Tampa is honing her skills as a construction litigation lawyer, having recently earned a prestigious board certification, and she looks forward to being nominated as a partner.

She has also recently participated in her son’s pre-K apple pie baking day, and she looks forward to dinner and weekends with her family.

“I always wanted to be a mother — I blink my eyes and my son’s already 4 years old. But being challenged and having a rewarding career is also rewarding to me,” Thomas said.

Reporter Dave Simanoff can be reached at (813) 259-7762 or dsimanoff@tampatrib.com.

“I want a fulfilling personal life, and I want the flexibility to develop my career on my path.”

It wasn’t too long ago that Thomas and other professionals would have been asked to sacrifice personal goals to further career ambitions. But today, professionals are embracing new attitudes about success.

Some, such as Thomas, are learning to balance a rewarding career with a satisfying personal life. Others say personal considerations are playing a larger role in the types of jobs they choose and the number of hours they’re working a week.

Experts attribute the trend to a handful of factors:

A wave of new technology. This allows people to stay productive and remain in touch with clients and co-workers, even if they’re not in the office.

The rise of the Millennial Generation. This large and highly vocal demographic group is just now entering the workforce and expects employers to understand the balance between professional and personal life.

That, in turn, is changing corporate mores and shaking up baby-boomer obstinacy.

Long-term career paths. Many young employees don’t envision spending their entire career with a single company.

So the rewards that may have tempted previous generations to scrap their personal lives for long hours at work — such as a corner office after 30 years of toil — aren’t nearly as tempting anymore.

“Instead of there being one social norm of success, success is becoming a much more open question. It’s a much more multivariable concept,” said workplace expert Bruce Tulgan, author of “It’s Okay to Be the Boss” and founder of Rainmaker Thinking in New Haven, Conn.

Many people no longer want to forfeit their personal lives for money, rank and seniority — especially when the payoff is so many years in the future, Tulgan said.

“To Generation Y [the Millennial Generation], that sounds absurd,” he said. “It sounds like you’re trying to sell them a bridge.”

Interior Designer Mom Works 4 Days

Mary Farley is one of the professionals who opted to work fewer hours in the office.

After she gave birth to her first son seven years ago, she returned to her commercial interior design career. She quickly realized she would be happier working four days a week.

It was worrisome asking her bosses to change her schedule, but she knew she was respected and liked at work. The company agreed to let her work Monday through Thursday.

Now Farley works for CLW Real Estate Services Group in Tampa, where she coordinates interior design planning and standards for one of her company’s clients, a major financial services firm.

She still works four days a week. Today, she has two sons.

Once or twice a week, she works from home, pulling up all her work documents and files through a virtual private network on her home computer and teleconferencing with architects and designers in Chicago, Atlanta and New York.

“Being a working mother has its challenges, and working a day or two at home, with a four-day schedule, really eases the stress of trying to do it all,” Farley said. “It reduces the risk of burnout, too.”

It’s important to have a boss who trusts employees to work from home and gives those employees the tools to work away from the office, Farley said.

“It says they believe in me as a professional and value me as an employee,” she said. “It says they know I don’t have to be in the office to perform and succeed.”

Farley said she believes success comes from balancing her personal and professional goals.

“Success is to exceed the expectations of your client and employer, while maintaining a level of connection to your personal life,” she said.

Not Just About The Money

Lawyer Jared Smith said he considers the needs of his family and his wife, Suzette, when he weighs job offers.

Before accepting his current job a year ago at Rumberger, Kirk and Caldwell, the former Air Force JAG officer weighed several offers.

“One of the jobs promised well over $200,000 a year, but I looked at the hours that the attorneys were putting in, and I made the decision that even though the pay was excellent, it was not going to fit into my priorities,” he said.

Smith knows it might take him longer to achieve his career goals than someone who doesn’t have a family to raise. He knows it’s about balance.

“Ultimately, may this hurt my career a little bit? Could I have had more exposure, or could I have gotten my name out a little bit more? Yes, but I’m choosing to make that sacrifice,” he said. “I’m OK with that. I’m OK to go a little bit slower.”

Back at Holland & Knight’s offices —which, coincidentally, are just a few floors up from Rumberger, Kirk and Caldwell, in the same downtown Tampa office building — lawyer Natalie Thomas is comfortable with the speed at which her career is progressing.

The number of hours spent in the office? That’s a moot point, she said. It’s the quality of the work that’s most meaningful to her, her clients and her employer, she said. She, too, knows it’s about balance.

“It’s really important to find a place where you can perform that balancing act,” she said.

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Say It Like You Mean It

Posted Aug 5, 2007 by Alex Vila

Updated Aug 5, 2007 at 07:58 PM

Your lips are moving. Words are indeed coming out of your mouth. So why is it that people don’t seem to be listening to what you’re saying?

You’re not making a connection.

Mark Wiskup, a Tampa author and communication coach, says you’ll be heard, remembered, respected - and, yes, even liked - if you build a strong emotional connection when you’re talking to others.

Building those connections means more profitable business ties, more satisfying relationships with customers and co-workers and a more rewarding personal life, Wiskup says. What’s more, the extra effort you invest into building those connections now means less time and money spent fixing problems because of miscommunications later, he says.

Everyone’s born with the ability to make emotional connections with other people, but some folks may need some extra energy, tools, guidance and practice to become better communicators.

You’ll find the tools and guidance, along with examples and confidence-building assignments, in Wiskup’s latest book, “The It Factor” (Amacom, $14.95).

To get you started on the journey to becoming a better communicator who builds better connections, we’ve worked with Wiskup and compiled these seven tips.

We also sat down with Wiskup for a Q&A, which you’ll find on Page 6.

IGNORE Your Inner Cheerleader

When you’re talking to people, you’re competing for their attention. And they probably have a lot of things on their minds: global warming, dinner plans, what’s on television tonight, what’s going on in the Middle East, whether to buy an iPhone and so on.

How do you cut through all that mental clutter?

Start by eliminating your own mental baggage - specifically, the inner Mr. Rogers that says all your words are valuable and people always love listening to you. Wiskup says if you don’t ignore that inner voice, you’re probably yammering away on autopilot, and your listeners are probably zoning out.

Be Able To EXPLAIN WHAT YOU DO

When people ask what you do for a living, don’t start reciting your resume or regurgitating the marketing babble from your Web site.

“Talk about what you do for your clients - not what it says on your business card,” Wiskup says. “Do it in such a way that someone will care. Passion, not glibness, is what wins.”

For example, an accountant may want to explain that his or her firm helps clients be more successful by understanding their financial statement and paying just the right amount of taxes. He or she can also add that the firm helps clients find efficient ways to pay vendors and bill its customers.

Take Time To SAY WHY

Always make the effort to explain why people should care about what you’re saying. Never assume that they’ll make the same assumptions you’re making or that they’ll reach the same conclusions you’ve reached.

For example, if you’re telling a co-worker you need the quarterly sales figures by Thursday, he or she may figure that there’s not much harm in turning in those numbers a little late. If you explain that you need those sales figures by Thursday because you need to discuss them at an important meeting with investors on Friday morning, he or she might not be so careless about deadlines.

It’s Worth The Effort To BE DESCRIPTIVE

Good communicators paint pictures with words to get their points across. They don’t just talk about goals; they describe what it will feel like to cross the finish line.

Being descriptive takes time, energy and, in most cases, a lot more words. But Wiskup says the effort is always worth it because it forges a stronger emotional connection between the speaker and the listener.

Also, it takes less time to explain things properly upfront than it does to set things right later, he says.

SKIP THE JARGON If You Want To Sound Smarter

You won’t impress anyone by peppering your conversations with industry phrases and acronyms. You’ll make a stronger connect if you explain things clearly to people.

People who use jargon repeatedly aren’t proving anything, except that they’re capable of parroting words and phrases they heard elsewhere, Wiskup says.

SPICE Up Your Statistics So People Will Care

When you have statistics and numbers to relay, don’t just throw them out there. Wiskup says to be as descriptive as possible: Paint a picture for your audience about what the numbers mean, what the figures represent, what the statistics say.

If you’re telling people that your company’s sales rose 41 percent last year, explain how they rose 41 percent. If sales fell, explain why. Talk about what people in your firm are doing to make sure that the increases keep coming - or the decreases decline.

It’s impossible to do business without talking numbers and math, Wiskup says, but don’t let these trips into Microsoft Excel territory detour you from your goal of making strong, memorable connections with other people.

Don’t Come Across As A PATRONIZING BOOR

You might sound patronizing and not even know it!

Once you’ve started building a connection, Wiskup says, avoid words and phrases that might make you sound insincere, such as “honestly,” “certainly” and “basically.” He also advises against conversational distractions such as sports analogies and dated pop culture catchphrases including “don’t go there.”

It’s often best to say what you mean, instead of repeating something someone said last night on “SportsCenter” or “Ugly Betty.”

Reporter Dave Simanoff can be reached at (813) 259-7762 or dsimanoff@tampatrib.com.

Insights May Help People Enjoy Life, Business More

Mark Wiskup, a Tampa author and communications coach, shares more insights in an interview.

Why is it advantageous for people to become better communicators?

It’s a matter of getting the most out of life and out of your career.

If you want to have the most fun at work, if your goal is to make the most money, and if you want to get the most out of your friendships and your relationships, you have to connect with people.

Otherwise, you’re just going part of the way.

What is the “it factor”?

It’s the ability to connect with other people in such a way that they’re hearing you and not tuning you out.

It’s the first step to getting people to agree with you, to understand you - and, even if they don’t agree with you, to respect you.

What should people do if they’re out and they feel they simply can’t connect with other people?

If you can’t ask someone a question - [such as] what do they do? - then stay at home and watch TV. You have to be willing to ask a couple of questions.

I say ask three. What do you do? Once they tell you what they do, ask how their clients like that. Then offer up something of your own. If you don’t feel like you’ve connected, move on.

How did you get interested in this subject?

Ever since I was a reporter, I wondered why certain people make connections, whether they were at a cocktail party or a business meeting or making a speech, and why some people always fail.

I started watching and taking notes. I found out that the people who are good at making connections, the people we like seeing, were following a certain set of rules.

That’s what the book’s about: the rules that let you connect with others.

Young professionals might feel nervous about approaching an older businessperson. What’s your advice in that situation?

It’s a moment of joy when a younger person, at a business function, approaches an older person and says, “Tell me about your firm.”

If the goal is not to sell anything at that moment, just to make a connection, the older person feels flattered and delighted that the young pup is asking them a question.

Reporter Dave Simanoff can be reached at (813) 259-7762 or dsimanoff@tampatrib.com.

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They Manage All This And More

Posted Jul 16, 2007 by Beth Gaddis

Updated Jul 16, 2007 at 08:28 AM

By CORRIE BENFIELD
The Tampa Tribune

What job requires you to have the skills of a psychologist, a plumber, a personal shopper, an animal control officer, a janitor and a chief operating officer? If you’re an office manager, you already know.

These skills might not be in the job description, but they popped up in a survey by Staples of more than 8,000 office managers.

More than half of the managers said they perform the jobs of at least 10 different workers in one week, reported the office supply company, which solicited responses on its Web site.

As part of the survey, Salary.com determined that some managers could be making $90,000 a year based on the variety of work they do. That compares with the industry average of $54,000.

Despite their hectic work lives, the managers kept their sense of humor. Here are some of the office supplies they compared themselves to and some of the oddest responsibilities they have taken on.

Stapler: I am always holding it all together.

Liquid paper: I am constantly covering up people’s mistakes.

Calendar: I keep track of everyone’s events.

Correction fluid: My job changes from minute to minute.

Staple remover: I undo problems.

Calculator: I am always crunching numbers.

Glue stick: I hold it all together.

Fire extinguisher: I constantly put out fires.

Mouse: I am always all over the place.

File folder: I am constantly organizing.

Copier: I have to record everything.

Packing tape: Everyone depends on me to hold this place together.

MOST UNUSUAL JOBS
Talk about multitasking. Here are some of the oddest tasks office managers noted on the Staples survey.
•Unclogging the toilet while being on hold on the phone and signing for a delivery

•Helping the owners plan a family vacation

•Buying the boss’s mother a birthday card

•Clearing snow from the parking lot

•Scooping the cat litter

•Giving the boss a haircut

•Babysitting the boss’s kids

•Cleaning pigeon poop off the sidewalks

•Breaking up an office romance

•Paying the rent one month because the business owner didn’t have the money

•Overseeing the remodeling and decorating of the office and restrooms

•Taking an employee shopping for proper attire

•Figuring out what to do about animals trapped inside the office walls

•Storing someone’s ashes

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Worst Career Tips Parents Give Their Kids

Posted Jul 9, 2007 by Vidisha Priyanka

Updated Jul 9, 2007 at 08:49 AM

By DAVE SIMANOFF
The Tampa Tribune

Honor thy mother and father. But think twice before honoring their career advice.

Penelope Trunk, the blogger and author we’re interviewing in today’s Tampa Tribune, says parents today often miss the mark when it comes to career advice for recent college graduates and young professionals.

The problem? The parents are baby boomers, and they’re dispensing advice that worked for members of their generation. The advice is passe because their children are members of the Millennial generation, also called Generation Y, which has different expectations about work and success.

The advice also is outdated because the workplace is changing, too, mainly to accommodate the Millennial employees.

“Baby boomers’ kids trust them so much, but their parents are giving advice that’s not going to help them be happy,” Trunk says. “The parents just need a little education about what the new work force entails.”

Here, Trunk shares the five worst pieces of advice that baby boomer parents give their Millennial children - and why the advice isn’t good:

Don’t Job Hop
Job hopping is so commonplace today that even HR departments that pretend to frown upon it won’t actually penalize anyone for it. In fact, job hopping is one of the fastest and most efficient ways Millennial workers build their career networks and learn skills, Trunk says.

“These days, the scariest thing in the world is to be in a job for seven years, then have to look for a job,” she says.

Make Enough Money To Support Yourself
Let junior move back into the house. If you force your kids to support themselves right out of high school or college, you’ll force them into jobs or career fields that may pay well but that they might not enjoy.

Baby boomer parents must realize that, adjusted for inflation, entry-level jobs don’t pay as well as they once did, Trunk says.

In addition, the costs of obtaining an education are much higher than they used to be, health care costs are astronomical, and Millennials have monthly expenses for items that were luxuries, or simply unheard of, when baby boomers were young, such as Internet access and cell phone service.

“If everybody had to support themselves, we’d have a glut of investment bankers,” she says.

Don’t Let There Be Any Gaps On Your Resume
It’s OK to take time off to travel, learn a new skill or do volunteer work. Just make sure your child is prepared to talk about what he or she has learned from these experiences, Trunk says.

“Having big ideas is what’s going to make a career, and the only way to have a big idea is to give yourself space to breathe,” she says. “So it doesn’t matter if you have a gap. It matters how you talk about it.”

Go To Grad School
Many people, including quite a few boomer parents, have unrealistic expectations about MBAs, law degrees, MFAs and PhDs. If you’re confused about your career options, grad school won’t necessarily give you perspective; however, it will provide plenty of bills, Trunk warns.

“You think you get a graduate degree and you’re on a nice, safe path. … But you better know exactly what you’re going to do with that degree afterward,” she says.

Work Hard And You’ll Be Rewarded
Put your nose to the grindstone? “That’s great for history class,” Trunk says. “But the work world is about teamwork and helping each other and vision; it’s a totally different skill set.”

The Millennial generation is transforming the American workplace, and competition is giving way to collaboration.

“Some people get so uppity about how the workplace is changing, but everyone should be excited to make this shift now,” she says. “It should be exciting to go to a workplace where people are rewarded for kindness.”

Reporter Dave Simanoff can be reached at (813) 259-7762 or dsimanoff@tampatrib.com.

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David Vs. Goliath: In Small-Business’s Corner

Posted Jul 1, 2007 by Vidisha Priyanka

Updated Jul 1, 2007 at 09:46 PM

By DAVE SIMANOFF
The Tampa Tribune

Some business owners are encouraging you to think about more than hot dogs and fireworks this holiday.

They’re encouraging you to think about your wallet - specifically, where the bills in it are being spent and where the credit cards are being swiped.

The Tampa Independent Business Alliance in celebrating the July 1 to 7 Independents Week, and its members are encouraging local shoppers to sidestep the national chains in favor of locally owned retailers and restaurants.

“We want to encourage the community to support the efforts of unique, independent businesses that are improving the quality of life in our neighborhoods,” said David Brown, co-owner of the Old Tampa Book Co. in downtown Tampa.

Several studies say independent businesses play an important role in an area’s economic health and cultural distinctiveness. Information about Independents Week is available on the business alliance’s Web site at tibatampa.org.

Lee Wolfson offers his employees dental coverage, health care and profit-sharing plans.

He doesn’t manage the local office of Ernst & Young. He’s not the senior partner of a Tampa law firm. He’s not vice president of the Tampa operations of IBM.

He owns Vinyl Fever, the south Tampa music shop mainstay that presents itself as the alternative to the big-box CD warehouses. In this compact Henderson Boulevard store, the loudspeakers are loud, the music selection is eclectic, and the customers are studious as they flick-flick-flick their way through racks of used and new CDs.

“I think many would be surprised by the benefits that are offered by many independent businesses,” Wolfson said.

Wolfson is one of thousands of owners of small, independent businesses in the Tampa Bay area that compete with large corporations not just for customers, but also for workers. It’s a problem that’s especially acute, given that unemployment in this area has been holding steady for several years, which means there’s not a particularly large pool of candidates roaming around looking for work.

Owners of these independent retailers, restaurants and professional agencies admit they’re in a David-and-Goliath struggle: They don’t have the advantages of gigantic human resources and marketing departments and can’t always match their competitors’ salaries and benefits.

But what fun is a David-and-Goliath struggle if David doesn’t win - at least some of the time?

Small business owners say they’re attracting and retaining talented, loyal, passionate workers by emphasizing the differences that set them apart from the large corporations: more individuality, a close-knit work force, a familylike atmosphere, flexibility, a greater role in making decisions.

“I think independent businesses can be like families, and with that comes a more personal and emotional investment in the employees. And the employees themselves feel a sense of pride and ownership in the business,” Wolfson said.

Vinyl Fever has five employees. Wolfson doesn’t see the big music store chains as his competition for workers.

“We don’t have much turnover here at Vinyl Fever, but there seem to be no shortage of music fanatics who want to work here,” he said. “We usually have a stack of resumes on file of people to call when the opportunity arises, and we are always accepting resumes.”

And the music stores in the malls? The big-box retailers such as Best Buy and Circuit City?

“I don’t view us as in competition with them on the labor front,” Wolfson said.

“We don’t need large quantities of people but need all our employees to be of high quality. Our business is based upon our enthusiasm for music - and related pop culture - and we’ve often been able to meet our labor needs by hiring customers who want to work here for the same reasons they shop here.”

Drawn To The Store’s Mission
A few miles away, at Inkwood Books in south Tampa, co-owner Carla Jimenez shrugs off any talk of being at a disadvantage for labor against competitors such as Barnes & Noble and Borders.

“I think it’s a false premise to think that we’re having trouble; we have greater stability, greater longevity with our employees,” she said.

Inkwood’s three employees have been at the store for one, three and four years; it also has two co-owners who work at the store, and several former workers still help out on weekends and during peak periods.

“The kind of people that apply for a job at Inkwood have already made a decision that they want to work for a locally owned independent store,” she said. “They are already buying into our mission.”

At Inkwood, like at Vinyl Fever, turnover is low, and there’s a stack of resumes of potential candidates waiting to fill any positions that open up.

“We start with a world of people that are interested in us - not just interested in a paycheck,” Jimenez said.

How To Compete
Small business owners looking to succeed in the labor market must remember that compensation is only part of the solution, said David Sikora, director of Gevity HR, a Bradenton company that provides human resources and personnel services.

If a small firm can’t offer a candidate as much money or as many benefits as a large company, it may be able to offer more responsibility, a better job title or greater chances for growth and advancement, Sikora said.

Many small firms also can offer a friendly, familylike work environment and a comfortable culture.

Small business owners also should look at themselves as full-time “corporate talent scouts,” networking for potential hires all the time instead of just trying to fill positions when they open. Today, networking and nontraditional recruiting sources such as online communities engender greater results than classified newspaper ads, Sikora said.

Research done by Gevity HR and Cornell University shows it’s important for small business owners to hire people who fit well into their firms’ culture and interact well with other employees. The research says that small businesses also benefit from familylike working environments, where a lot of information is shared with workers and employees know one another socially.

The results: faster sales growth, higher profit growth and lower employee turnover, Sikora said.

Maryann Ferenc, owner of Mise en Place restaurant in Tampa, agrees it’s important for small businesses to hire talented, passionate staff members.

“Retention is a huge issue, and good and accurate hires are important,” she said. “You have to share your corporate culture, your vision and your personality with folks during the interview process.”

It’s OK to pick a candidate who fits in with employees, as long as the decision doesn’t discriminate against any of the classes of people protected by civil rights legislation, said Theresa Gallion, managing partner for the Tampa and Orlando offices of law firm Fisher & Phillips.

“Smaller employers often are much more concerned with who fits in with their culture, and as long as their rationale is not stereotypical or illegal, they’re able to do that,” she said.

Large Employers’ Lure
Large employers bring a lot to the bargaining table, too. Starbucks, which boasts 100,000 workers, offers benefits such as health care and a stock investment plan to employees working 20 hours or more a week.

In addition, the company is regularly recognized as one of best employers in the United States.

“We recognize it’s good for business, it’s good for partner morale, and it signifies our culture - our partners come first,” said Chris Cindrick, marketing specialist for Starbucks Coffee Co.

Despite the allure of the major employers, there doesn’t appear to be any shortage of people who want to work for small, independent businesses, either. Wolfson said his employees like feeling they have an active role in running the store - merchandising, policies, decision-making. And that allure, he said, isn’t going away any time soon.

“Our store, like many independent businesses, has a personality all its own that you won’t find in big-box or chain stores. Hopefully it’s a likable one!”

Reporter Dave Simanoff can be reached at (813) 259-7762 or dsimanoff@tampatrib.com.

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